the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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