Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
so my phone autocorrects 'retard' to 'retaaahd'. i LOVE being a masshole!
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
New holiday tradition. Eat all the Xanax in the am, then wake up later after festivities and eat all the leftovers
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Randomize