happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
