I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
I like how I get messages from eharmony at the same time I'm looking for a new vibrator. It's like the powers that be are just trying to make my life ironic.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go christen that room with your naked body.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
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