Your tits are I can't wait for
Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
Less talking, more tequila
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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