Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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