her vagine was all disorganized.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Randomize
