idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
