Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
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Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
We are all done wearing pants today
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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