How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
