this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
