brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I hate your face
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
