summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
I don't know, Alex. I don't know. I lost my keys, my debit card, my makeup bag, broke my purse, had to have someone cut my shoe off, I have no idea where my costume is. I woke up next to the biggest douchebag I know and made out with this other guy while SIMULTANEOUSLY talking on the phone to the guy I'm talking to...
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
Randomize