Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
Randomize