The guy next to me is watching porn. EVERYTIME I COME TO THE LIBRARY SOME RANDOM GUY NEXT TO ME LOOKS AT PORN.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Randomize
