Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
Randomize
