Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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