So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
How's work?
Spinning.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
