hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Randomize
