I came back to the apartment and he was waiting for me, covered in mustard.
needless to say I left
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
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She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
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I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
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