grandma shit on top of the toilet
If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
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