morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
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