I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize
