What a fucking waste of an outfit
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
My dad is sitting where you rode me
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
