It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Randomize
