Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
He just kept yelling cup my balls to everyone they kicked us out after 20 min
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
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