I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
you win again, gameday.
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
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