ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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