Liz and I are now offficially highest. OH, and your girlfriend may be a vampire. Heads up. SPARKLESSSSS
Put my glitter back.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
Thanks for leaving me with drunk gabby
Hahahaha why what's happening?
She's sending me morse code through the wall....typical
Randomize