Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Oh you have a half-brother? Why that's right up my alley! Let's cause family strife
Tearing families apart since 2011.
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
