Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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