Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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