i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Randomize
