I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
What kind of sociopath goes to sleep at 9pm when I clearly need attention
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
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