you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Slutty costumes are my most sacred holiday tradition! Wearing a not-slutty costume is like putting cheezwiz on a communion wafer.
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
