I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
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