I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
He told me to be a woman and make him dinner. So I threw a bagel at him and went out to dinner.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize
