absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Randomize