He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
Can I color on your dick again?
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
