This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize