i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
