i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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