Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
