Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
Hey we met at the bar a week ago. Your friend gave me a rose and you asked about my nipples.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
Randomize
