woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Randomize
