Just fell off a train. Bad.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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