Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Randomize