Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
You are a genius and a whore.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
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