What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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