How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
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