it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
Randomize
