My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
foreskin is a definite game changer
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
Randomize
