Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
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